How to raise children in America:

"To be a "hands-on" parent, at least 10 of the following 12 must be true.
You must:
* Monitor what your kids are watching on TV.
* Monitor their use of the Internet.
* Put restrictions on CDs they buy.
* Impose a curfew.
* Make it clear that you would be ''extremely upset'' if your teen used Marijuana .
* Eat dinner with your teen six or seven nights a week.
* Assign regular chores for your teen."

And put an GPS collar around their necks for safe keeping. Only then will they grow up to be good, clean, god-loving parents themselves...